President Niger's Message to the Provo Utah Married Student 2nd Stake

President Niger's Message to the Provo Utah Married Student 2nd Stake

I've done my best to capture as much of President Neiger's talk as possible, because I truly believe it is so important for us to listen (or read) and hearken to his words. I believe that it's as important for us to hearken to this counsel as it is to our apostles' and prophet's. Holding the priesthood keys of Stake President,  President Neiger does receive  inspiration from heaven about what we all in this stake need to hear and do .

As always, he's given us some counsel on goals to achieve in our lives. I've bolded and numbered the over arching goals he feels inspired for us to achieve, and put the more specific challenges he gave us to get there in purple.

First, President Neiger challenged us to:

1. Read Moroni 10:32-34 together as a couple and discuss the purpose of sanctification in our lives. What do you believe sanctification to be?

The purpose of life is to become Holy, or sanctified.

Sometimes we feel there's a chasm, like the grand canyon, that separates us from God. COme unto Christ - he helps us overcome and return.

2. Study the parable of the 10 Virgins in Mathew 25 together as a couple. Remember the President Kimball taught that the 10 virgins represent members of the church.

It is not that the 5 virgins did not share out of spite, but because they knew oil was something they could not give. The fire, or light of the lamp, is the spirit/light of an obedient life. Every good dead and act of obedience is a drop of oil added to our personal lamp. It makes sense to me know why the 5 could not share - we can not live another person's life in obedience, only they can do this for themselves. 

It is President Neiger's opinion that our judgment will be based upon how much light we attained in this life. 

Next, President Neiger read two questions that he received when he asked a group of Men in the stake to write down on a note card the one question they would like to ask him. He chose to answer 2: what is the goal or vision you have for us as members of your stake and what is your biggest concern for us? 

His answers: 

1. Work with all our souls to have a strong, covenant marriage.

Not surprisingly, President Neiger's biggest concern for us is tied to his first goal he wishes us all to strive for. He said the one of the most heart wrenching things he hears from stake members is that they are getting divorced. He said he was surprised about how many divorces happen within our stake. He did not expect to hear this dreaded news so often from stake members at the time he was called to serve as Stake President. 

I believe that President Neiger was very inspired about what practices we should include in our marriage to keep it healthy and strong. Everyone in the stake fell in love only a short time ago, up to a few years, as we are all students. What could drive us apart to early into our marriage? I'm sure the ways are endless, so instead we focus on what we should do today, to maintain or revitalize the most important relationship we have, the only thing that we will carry with us out of this life. 

          1. Pray daily as a couple (morning and night is ideal, once as a minimum), and talk about what you               are thinking and feeling about the things you've prayed concerning so that you can recognize                           revelation together.

          2. Hold FHE weekly. This can be as simple as reading a conference talk to together and talking                      about it or visiting temple square. 

          3. Attend the temple regularly together. A good idea is to replace a recreational activity or date                  with a date to the temple together. President Niger talked about how he went with his wife last                      week to the temple and they ate in the cafeteria afterwards. He said they were surrounded by '90                  year olds' but that it was lovely and they enjoyed the food and their  time together. 

          4. Don't raise your voice to one another.

          5. Serve one another (one small act a day is all it takes). 

          6. Treat your spouse with the utmost kindness and sensitivity. Do not make a dig at your                        spouse in private or in public to get attention. All we need is a little pivot to change our trajectory.                  Kindness can be that pivot. 

I found some Mormon Message videos that emphasize some of the points about nourishing marriages, as President Neiger talked about:

Saving Your Marriage

Expressions of Love

2. Hold Tight to the Iron Rod

• Read and Discuss 1 Nephi 8 & 11 with your spouse.

The tree is the Saviour, the fruit is His grace. All it takes is a small crack for Satan to get in and drive us apart, it is surprisingly easy for an lds couple to want a divorce if they don't hold to the rod. Hold to the rod. Do not be as the children of Israel, many of whom died because they would not look at the brass serpent Moses commanded them to look at. They died because they would not accept the simpleness of the way. Our marriage relationships, like a living thing, can easily die if we reject the simpleness of the way.

3. Be Engaged in Missionary Work

The prophet's highest priority right now is missionary work.

4. Create Unity in the Ward
Think about what you can do each week.


5. Serve One Another (ward members)
President Neiger brought up a couple of examples in our stake. One sister changed her schedule so that she could go on walks with a sister she found out was having a difficult time. Another sister created a group for sisters struggling with infertility; they strengthened each other and brought some happiness into tough days. President Neiger said he could go on and on about all the good reports he's heard from bishops (yay - go sisters! I know you are a part of that, or will be soon).

"Treat everyone with extra kindness. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

President Neiger then talked briefly about how a friend took him to play some baseball and after 15 minutes he was feeling like he was in high school again and rejuvenated. He was having a tough week and his friend's kindness was the little pivot that changed the way his week was going.

President Neiger then quoted C.S. Lewis:
"It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no 'ordinary' people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilisations -- these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whome we joke with, work with, marry, snub and exploit -- immortal horrors or everlasting splendours."

And Ralph Waldo Emerson:
"To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."

He finished with his short and powerful testimony:
"The gospel is true. I know it with every fiber of my being."

Contributing to the Lord's Work - Our Class Discussion

I feel like in our Relief Society, the class participation is really what makes it great. I remember when I was a teacher how great it was to have the participation of everyone. Our teachers do a great job of inspiring us to share comments which really bring out a lot of good stories and perspectives.

The main 2 points that I took away from the comments today was that the little things we do can add up to make something great and that the way we live our lives is the best way to share the gospel.

Cassidy reminded us again that a single bee only produces 1/12 of a teaspoon of honey in it's life - that does not seem like very much to us humans! If a little honey bee thought and felt the way we humans do, it would be easy for the bee to feel sad that it only makes so little of a contribution to the hive, but this is not the way nature intended it to work! Bees are designed to be successful when they work together as a team - they can make pounds and pounds of honey together! The collective effort of all the bees is what adds up to many pounds of honey. It's quite incredible if you think about it. We as members of the church are no different than the honey bees in this regard- together, each doing our own little part (how ever difficult or easy it may seem) adds up to be a great amount of good done in the world, which really makes a difference in people's lives!

Lisa had us read stats about the welfare of the church in the lesson, and it's important to remember that the church wouldn't be growing without our individual and collective efforts.

What might be holding you back from contributing more, or something that you're holding back?

The little things like a kind word or a prayer in their behalf aren't just what makes a difference in others' lives, but in our own as well. I really liked what Rachael Ann said - "The small things are what make you strong."

As I said, it was noted a few times that who we are often goes much farther than what we say in sharing the gospel. We had a visitor today who told a story about how this inactive lady never let her visiting teachers in, but they always left something with a message every month for her. Some time later the woman became active, in large part do to the faithful, loving examples of service her visiting teachers showed her. Our sister said how she heard the woman herself tell the story, and she pointed out that her visiting teachers never found out that she became active again, because it was some time after the sisters no longer lived in her area. She said, "For all they know I am still inactive. They will not know that because of their examples I am active now." Just think how easy it would have been to think that their seemingly small effort to leave something with a thought once a month wouldn't be enough to change the sister's heart.

To add to this point, Mary shared a wonderful story about her dad. I messaged her to get the story straight. She said, "he was totally inactive for 10 years while he was living in Alaska. The rest of his family lived in Oregon and Idaho, so they just prayed a lot for him and kept living the gospel. He saw the way their lives were going and realized that's what he wanted for himself and started coming back to church and has been fully active ever since. His family NEVER thought he would come back, so basically don't ever give up on anyone, there are no lost causes :)"

 Lisa, our teacher, then shared her testimony that praying for people, when they don't want to hear the gospel now, really does make a difference.

I feel like I'm hearing so much about sharing the gospel lately. I really need to think about with whom and how I can share the gospel, by living an example worth emulating and reaching out to others.

Are you thinking about how to share the gospel? Now is the time to do it. The change of the colors of the leaves brings about a lovely season - I love fall because it is so beautiful. The change of the seasons reminds us that we too are meant to change with time and that none of us were meant to go through life without adjusting our patterns, thoughts or state of being. We are children of light - find the true source of light this week by turning to the Saviour through thought, word and prayer.

Remember about the little honey bees who work so hard to produce what seems like so little this week. Believe that your actions amount to something. You are wonderful! I believe in you and I know our presidency does too.

Upcoming Events

There is lots of awesome goodness coming up!


Stake Conference:
                    General Sessions:
                    Sat. 10/26 @  6 pm
                    Sun 10/27 @  10 am
                    Priesthood Session:
                    Sun 10/27 @ 7 am

                    All meetings @ Multi-stake building 350 N 900 E Provo, UT

Parties!:
                 Fall Party - Relief Society and friends
                 10/16  @ 7 pm
                 Bring your favorite pumpkin recipe with the recipe and samples
                 We will make fall wreaths!
                 Ward Halloween Party
                 10/29 @ the church,7 pm

Other Activities:
                 Free Bikini Bootcamp
                 M & W @ 6 pm

                 Text Maria Haynes for more info 707-301-6434

                 Return to Music Day - $5 Piano Lesson Charity Event
                 Lessons by Kristen Pothoof
                 Register for a time slot - call Kristen 813-469-5347, or  online at  PothoofPianoStudio.com
                 Returntomusicday.com




     

 “Hold up your light that it may shine unto the world. Behold I am the light which ye shall hold up.”
-3 Nephi 18:24